Lafayette Journal & Courier

Television may have impact on your relationships

By DOROTHY SCHNEIDER
February 28, 2007

Spending too many nights watching television shows like Friends might jeopardize your chances of making your own, one Purdue professor says.

Communications Professor Glenn Sparks said recent research shows television can have an isolating effect, even when it's watched as a group or date activity. It can have a big impact on students like Purdue freshman Alex Dye, who spends much of his time watching TV in friends' dorm rooms.

"I'm less focused on what people say because I tend to focus on the television more," Dye said.

Sparks said it's a common experience that can deteriorate relationships in the long run unless people make an effort to communicate without the television blaring in the background.

The American Academy of Pediatrics reports children watch about four hours of television daily. And Nielsen Media Research reported last fall that the average American home has more television sets than people, with 2.73 TVs and 2.55 people in the typical home. Furthermore, half of American homes have three or more TVs, Nielsen reported.

"We are spending an increasing amount of time today looking at screens, rather than looking at other people's faces," Sparks said. "There is a subtle effect. And that's something that we probably need to be sensitive to and try to deflect as much as we can."

Sparks invited pairs or groups of friends in for the research project and then left them waiting in the lobby with a television either on or off.

"While they thought that they were waiting for the real study to begin, they were in the study," he said.

After 10 minutes, Sparks would finally bring the friends in and ask about the conversation they'd had while waiting. The results weren't too surprising, but Sparks said it was important to document that conversation dropped by about 35 percent between the friends when a television was on in the room.

"There is at least a strong potential -- in that kind of casual setting with potential for conversation -- for television to inhibit the quality and quantity of communication," he said.

Still, Sparks doesn't consider television "all negative." He said sometimes television can bring people together -- like encouraging water-cooler conversation about American Idol or Survivor. Sparks said couples can also make a decision to watch shows together and have it be a shared experience, something to talk about during and after the program.

But Sparks said people need to be conscious of the way they use television. For groups, he suggested muting the TV during commercials to see how it changes the social environment.

"For romantic couples, I at least encourage them to ask the question of the utility of having a television set in their bedroom," he said. "People have different answers to this. Sometimes people watch TV purposefully together in their bedroom."

But if the TV has become "an intruder" in the relationship, he said, it's got to go.

Tamara Dunford of West Lafayette said her family doesn't watch much television, even though she likes it a lot. But cutting back on time in front of the tube in the last couple of years has encouraged her children -- ages 2, 5 and 7 -- to be more creative and play together.

"The less media we watch, the more time we have to do fun stuff together," Dunford said. "And then when they do watch (TV or movies), it's more fun."